28 September 2004

the presidential debate drinking game

Now you can actually enjoy the series of presidential debates, starting tonight.

When either Kerry or Bush say any of the following, guess what, you get to get a little more schnockered.

"Make no mistake" -drink one shot

"Iraq" -drink of beer

"Hence" -only Kerry will say this since Georgie doesn't know what it means. Have a drink of beer

"Weapons of mass distruction" -drink of beer (a small drink, you don't want to pass out too early)

"Irresponsible" -drink one shot

"The American people" -drink of beer

"Well, I'll tell you..." -total stalling mechanism. You should have time for two good chugs of beer

"When I'm president" -drink one shot. Dear god, is one of these clowns going to be our president?

"Now is the time" -drink of beer

"Manufacturing jobs" -drink of beer

"Hard-working families" -drink of beer

"Our great nation" -drink of beer

and finally...

"I'm not going to stoop to that level" -take two shots and go to bed. Politics are tiring!

26 September 2004

yet another reason why capitalism shouldn't go unchecked

Wal-Mart sent out a letter or as we say in marketing an "image piece" to California residents late last week. They've got a tv ad campaign as well. This company is so fucked up that they have to grovel to the people in order to build more stores.

They promise that every family in Southern Cali, where they seem to be concentrating their expansion efforts, will "save at least $589 per year" with the presence of one of their "supercenters." Right. Because... what? Every family is supposed to shop there? They actually expect that? BECAUSE THERE WON'T BE ANYPLACE ELSE TO SHOP? They have the gall to say this when they are facing literally dozens of discrimination and ill-treatment lawsuits and do everything they can to keep their employees from being represented by a union? They have the gall to say this to communities that are willing to do just about anything, including unseating their entire city council, to keep the slimeballs out of their areas? Bastards. I know I have tried many times, but I don't think that I will ever be able to express the intensity of my hatred of this boil on the butt of America.

dangerous, my foot

"Those who are most deserving of love will never be made happy by it."
-Glenn Close, Dangerous Liaisons (close approximation, anyway)

I gave that some thought. Probably some truth to it. Some people don't end up ever being really happy or fulfilled in a romantic situation. I wonder about myself sometimes.

Of course old Glennie was speaking of women, and basically explaining to a very young and voluptuous Uma Thurman that while men are happy by what they receive from women, women are made happy by what they give. Seems kind of fucked up although I'm sure that's true for a lot of people. Daughters have it rough. We are taught these things very early on, and it's hard to change.

Other than that little contemplation, and the aforementioned voluptuousness of such an alluring actress, there wasn't much redeeming about Dangerous Liaisons. I had never seen it all the way through until now. I realize it was a big deal in the 80s or whatever. And visually it's quite stunning, they did their homework for sure. But it was pretty stupid. John Malkovich is a great actor of course but in this movie he was about as emotive as his co-star Keanu Reeves. Glenn was great as always, but she just didn't have much to work with. The endless exposition, oh my god-- I hate to see good actors being reduced to forcing out a paragraph of dialogue about This Is My Motive and Here Is What I Plan To Do and This Is Why I Plan To Do It. Muaaah-ah.

The casual American accents just seemed so wrong. (Although it would have been worse had they adopted British accents as some American actors are wont to do any time they touch a period piece - *shudder*). Poor Michelle Pfieffer did what she could, although she really never got a chance to develop her own character; she was simply defined by the inane ramblings of two other characters. Didn't this thing win an Oscar for adapted screenplay or something? Jesus. It was terrible.

But, a big fat hallelujah to Netflix! (And thanks to Pooks for hooking me up.) I'm finally on that train. Man. You go there, put in a few pieces of information, click on some titles of movies you've always meant to see but never want to commit to at the video store, and bam, two days later they're sitting in your mailbox. Righteous. I'm thinking the next one will be much more enjoyable, got the 30th Anniversary Edition of Blazing Saddles. Aw yeah.

24 September 2004

i wanna be some raddichio

The universe is wondrous. As it is getting to be the time when I begin to obsess in earnest about all things Halloween, I met a wonderful, spirited man (who does like his spirits) called James who owns an amazing costume shop. He seemed to love me within five minutes of our knowing each other, which gay men are wont to do with me, and he told me that he can get me outfitted in an award-winning get-up for an amazing price. He can do a really intense Little Miss Muffet, or he has all the 80s stuff that would make a good Flashdance-era Jennifer Beals. I told him I wanted to be a man but he seemed really keen on getting me all femme'ed out. He thought I had a nice body, and let's face it, I love anyone who thinks I have a beautiful body! Anyway, he has everything you can imagine, going back to the 18th century. HE EVEN HAS A SPECIAL SECTION FOR FRUIT AND VEGETABLE COSTUMES. I'm almost afraid to walk into this place, because I think I might implode.

23 September 2004

thank god! more gazillionaires!

According to Forbes, "The combined net worth of the nation's wealthiest climbed to $1 trillion, up $45 billion in 12 months." The sheer number of billionaires has increased to its highest-ever levels.

And of course, from reading this journal you already know that CEO salaries have increased 279% in the past decade and that workers' income has increased 46%. And you also of course know that the number of Americans living in poverty increased by 1.3 million last year. People. We can't afford to elect more fucking Republicans, come on. We can't afford to elect more rank and file Dems, either. Are the true liberals in the house?? Time to get some equality up in here. Time to get some holistic evaluation in this joint and stop worrying so much about what we might lose. Because we're losing, big time.

11 September 2004

a day of sadness and anger

Three years ago today. Three years. The heart of this country was filled with such fear it almost burst. I cannot imagine the horror for those who were right there where it happened. It makes my blood cold to hear detailed accounts. I remember how long it took for everything to set in. We were so shocked, dying for information. Once the shock subsided a little, we wanted to know everything about what happened. Then we wanted to know why it happened.

Though those who had lost family members were left flailing in the misery of the aftermath, the torture of waiting while all the pieces were picked up, we were, as a nation, willing to do anything to get life back to the way it was. All the fear made us realize, perhaps, how much we had to lose. We wanted to drive our SUVs to work, to still be able to afford them. We wanted our tv and readily available, cheap food. We wanted our credit cards and our cell phones and our gym membership. This is the American lifestyle. It seems we will do anything to keep that.

And it's a bit easier to do that, isn't it, because Americans don't fight wars on our own soil. No, we go over to our enemies' land. If half of Texas were destroyed, that would certainly spark World War III.

Rather than be humbled and choose to take a long, deep look at the situation following the events of three years ago, we developed a taste for blood. In the days following, I heard several co-workers assert, "Bomb 'em!" Then all the American flags popped up. The battle cry had begun.

As the carnage wore on, pacifists were seeing some things in play below the surface. They took to the streets. They were dismissed as the scum of America. The "patriots" shook their fingers at them and said the peace protestors were undermining the great sacrifices being made.

The Bush regime and those of extreme political conservatism who continue to support it are the current destroyers of America. I am talking about those who continue to support war and a cowardly and dishonest "president" because that is what they've always done and the rhetoric sounds good and that is what you do when you're an American. I'm talking about those Americans who believe that Iraq had something to do with September 11, and hell, even if it didn't, they had the capacity to hurt us - so it's ok that we're tearing their country apart. Those who look at the number of children without healthcare in this country alone (over 10%), the richest country in the world, and say, Well, it's the parents' fault and their responsibility. Those who watch as Bush and most of Congress protect the filthy rich HMOs - even as the number of people insured by their employer falls sharply every year. Those who are busy supporting and implementing school vouchers so that they can send their kids to a "nice" (white) school. Even though they must know that nothing in this country is going to change until all kids are treated and educated equally. Those who protest when multi-unit housing goes up in their perfect little neighborhoods... neighborhoods that are so spread out that they've taken up 80% of the wild- and farmland in the area. Those who stand on the side of corporations and highly imbalanced tax cuts as the American people are enslaved, the minimum wage remains too low to survive on, and hard workers may be denied significant overtime pay. Those who say we must pray for and honor our troops, yet say and do nothing when the Bush administration prohibits photos of the coffins of our war dead. Those who somehow still believe that the answer to all this fighting is more fighting, that we can and should win the war on terror. Those who believe that the government had no idea September 11 was going to happen and had no way of stopping it. Those who refuse to see that they had plans to overthrow both the Taliban and Hussein before that horrible day. Those who are duped into participating in the smear campaigns on the enemies of Bush - campaigns orchestrated by Karl Rove. Those who write off critical thinkers who've read books by George Orwell and who know a bit about the people's history and who warn that we're headed for a really different way of life. Those who say we should stand by our president and who believe that those "Middle Easterners" who mean us harm are freedom haters.

The real freedom hater is George Walker Bush.

The reality of what is going on is right here under our noses. Why are people clinging to this Disney paradigm depicting a good president from a good family who leads a strong and proud nation to war?

Because then I guess they'd have to change.

Shame on you, you who follow the bouncing ball of the Bush-Rove-Cheney agenda. Wake up.

10 September 2004

blood red

So I read Travis LaFrance's blog, and found that he wrote about a Republican singles' mixer he encountered during the RNC.

He observes an NPR reporter who asks one of the guests at this shindig about dating. The conservative guy apparently couldn't quite get over the fact that there was a representative of NPR in their midst. His response had nothing to do with his love life:

"'I don't trust any station that doesn't support itself with advertisements,' he announced, his body taking a defensive posture. 'I don't trust any news organization that has to ask for money. And then purport to be unbiased.'

"The reporter smiled and held out the mic: 'So have you met any woman [sic] tonight?'

"'If you hand over your revenue to the free market, you're guaranteed to be neutral,' the fellow demanded. 'No offense, but that's how it works.'"


At this same event, Travis asks a potential date what her interests are:

"The stockmarket. Ways of earning income without working."

She then inquires: "Do you have any investments?"

"No."

"It's no wonder you can't get a girlfriend."


The heart and soul of America, I tell you. The heart and soul.

07 September 2004

I miss you. I miss the feeling of laying on the world and watching the stars and humans take their places. I miss breakfast on Saturday morning. I miss casual cocktails. I miss serendipity. I miss knowing that the fountain will always be refilled. I miss alchemy. I miss knowing when a song needs to be played twice. I miss you.

02 September 2004

from george saunders

Manifesto
A press release from PRKA.

Last Thursday, my organization, People Reluctant To Kill for an Abstraction, orchestrated an overwhelming show of force around the globe.

At precisely 9 in the morning, working with focus and stealth, our entire membership succeeded in simultaneously beheading no one. At 10, Phase II began, during which our entire membership did not force a single man to suck another man's penis. Also, none of us blew himself/herself up in a crowded public place. No civilians were literally turned inside out via our powerful explosives. In addition, at 11, in Phase III, zero (0) planes were flown into buildings.

During Phase IV, just after lunch, we were able to avoid bulldozing a single home. Furthermore, we set, on roads in every city, in every nation in the world, a total of zero (0) roadside bombs which, not being there, did not subsequently explode, killing/maiming a total of nobody. No bombs were dropped, during the lazy afternoon hours, on crowded civilian neighborhoods, from which, it was observed, no post-bomb momentary silences were then heard. These silences were, in all cases, followed by no unimaginable, grief-stricken bellows of rage, and/or frantic imprecations to a deity. No sleeping baby was awakened from an afternoon nap by the sudden collapse and/or bursting into flame of his/her domicile during Phase IV.

In the late afternoon (Phase V), our membership focused on using zero (0) trained dogs to bite/terrorize naked prisoners. In addition, no stun guns, rubber batons, rubber bullets, tear gas, or bullets were used, by our membership, on any individual, anywhere in the world. No one was forced to don a hood. No teeth were pulled in darkened rooms. No drills were used on human flesh, nor were whips or flames. No one was reduced to hysterical tears via a series of blows to the head or body, by us. Our membership, while casting no racial or ethnic aspersions, skillfully continued not to rape, gang-rape, or sexually assault a single person. On the contrary, during this late-afternoon phase, many of our membership flirted happily and even consoled, in a nonsexual way, individuals to whom they were attracted, putting aside their sexual feelings out of a sudden welling of empathy.

As night fell, our membership harbored no secret feelings of rage or, if they did, meditated, or discussed these feelings with a friend until such time as the feelings abated, or were understood to be symptomatic of some deeper sadness.

It should be noted that, in addition to the above-listed and planned activities completed by our members, a number of unplanned activities were completed by part-time members, or even nonmembers.

In London, a bitter homophobic grandfather whose grocery bag broke open gave a loaf of very nice bread to a balding gay man who stopped to help him. A stooped toothless woman in Tokyo pounded her head with her hands, tired beyond belief of her lifelong feelings of anger and negativity, and silently prayed that her heart would somehow be opened before it was too late. In Syracuse, New York, holding the broken body of his kitten, a man felt a sudden kinship for all small things.

Even declared nonmembers, it would appear, responded to our efforts. In Chitral, Pakistan, for example, a recent al-Qaida recruit remembered the way an elderly American tourist once made an encouraging remark about his English, and how, as she made the remark, she touched his arm, like a mother. In Gaza, an Israeli soldier and a young Palestinian, just before averting their eyes and muttering insults in their respective languages, exchanged a brief look of mutual shame.

Who are we? A word about our membership.

Since the world began, we have gone about our work quietly, resisting the urge to generalize, valuing the individual over the group, the actual over the conceptual, the inherent sweetness of the present moment over the theoretically peaceful future to be obtained via murder. Many of us have trouble sleeping and lie awake at night, worrying about something catastrophic befalling someone we love. We rise in the morning with no plans to convert anyone via beating, humiliation, or invasion. To tell the truth, we are tired. We work. We would just like some peace and quiet. When wrong, we think about it awhile, then apologize. We stand under awnings during urban thunderstorms, moved to thoughtfulness by the troubled, umbrella-tinged faces rushing by. In moments of crisis, we pat one another awkwardly on the back, mumbling shy truisms. Rushing to an appointment, remembering a friend who has passed away, our eyes well with tears and we think: Well, my God, he could be a pain, but still I'm lucky to have known him.

This is PRKA. To those who would oppose us, I would simply say: We are many. We are worldwide. We, in fact, outnumber you. Though you are louder, though you create a momentary ripple on the water of life, we will endure, and prevail.

Join us.

Resistance is futile.