hey love crusader, i want to be your space invader

Go here right now and watch the video for this hit song out of Molvania. Yes, it's Eastern Europe. No, I haven't heard of it either.

the king legacy

On NPR.

loving the phaeton

This car gets me all... ok I'll stop there. Seriously, the folks at VW just keep outdoing themselves in terms of design.

It has 4Motion, this all-wheel drive system that basically tracks the traction of each wheel separately and applies the ABS individually where needed. If one wheel is slipping, the system applies the brakes to that wheel and gives more torque to a wheel that has better traction. So the car handles great in all weather conditions. Even when you make a turn, power is automatically being shifted.

There are four zones of climate control, and it's all handled without vents blowing on you. The air is totally filtered too.

They combined TWO VR6 engines for this thing. (VW fans know that just one VR6 is pretty damned exciting.) And of course it comes with a Tiptronic transmission. Just looking at the engine makes me all tingly inside.

Massage seats. Automatic tire pressure sensors. Parking sensors (as in the car will tell you how far away you are from an object). 12-speaker sound system that you can set to different modes, if you're on the highway or street driving, etc. The windshield wipers sense how fast they need to be on.

Now, this car just gets a bad rap all around. Everyone agrees it's a fantastic machine, they just know it doesn't work in the market. VW has sold practically none. It's very sad, because people are so attached to the names of Mercedes, Lexus, Audi, that they just won't pay this much for a VW. Those are all great cars, but this one is just wicked. And they think that it was ego on the part of VW, they're just over there stroking themselves, but really they've always been the ones most true to what they do, and they're damned dedicated to good design. So if you want to keep moving onward and upward, this is what you do. It makes sense to me. But they'll probably stop making it in another four years.

bon giorno

And she's back. Man I'm already planning my next trip to Italy. Jesus. It's so good. So very, very good. Austria was incredible too, it's everything you would think, especially in the countryside. Very alpine village. So cute. And Vienna contains some of the most beautiful architecture I've ever seen. So much incredible detail.

Unfortunately I LOST most of my pictures but whatever yeah.

mullet haiku: new installment

From Melissa, our gal in San Diego (whom, let it noted, I did not call Mel):

fish fryin' thursday
tecate latte no foam
washin' back black beans


And from... um, some other San Diego guy, a holiday treat:

Turkey leg and beer
Happy Thanksgiving baby
You wanna get stuffed?

new mullet haiku from lorie

broken pick-up truck
waiting for pay day to come
american cheese


game in overtime
get me a beer, woman
make it a cold one


kids are hollerin'
dang dog had puppies again
goin' to the bar


you're sure real pretty
wanna take you for a ride
kissin' cousins now


my shotgun hangs here
rifle needs a good cleanin'
gotta be ready


lunch whistle blowin'
got fried balony sammich
wash it down with beer


[Ed. note: Extra points to Lorie for using "sammich."]

mullet haiku

I'm not sure I remember where the idea came from, but some time ago I wrote a couple of these and asked some friends to contribute. I found them buried in a folder and had a laugh. I don't remember whose is whose, so if you wrote one of these, let me know. Also, if you'd like to take a stab at a Mullet Haiku of your very own, send it to me!

Without further ado, Mullet Haiku:


7 Grape Kool-aid Packs
10 for a dollar Ramen
5 winning scratchers


PBR on tap
cockroach swims in foamy pool
Round Corner last night


cheese whiz in a can
tilt back head open my mouth
but nothing came out


Hamburger Helper
Spilt on my Auto Trader
S'all right, licked it off


the aroma of stale beer
the sweet sounds of John Bon Jovi
mom's home


Stop sign on dirt road
Taunts me with its brand new face
Hand me my damn gun


Family picnic
Sloppy Joes, Jell-O salad
Oops, shot cat - BBs


Gropin' for some boob
Trans-Am door slammed in my face
I don't need that tooth